3 Year Runiversary!

3 years ago today I ran my very first race. It feels like so long ago & so much has changed between then and now. It all started because I saw a 5k that raced through Disneyland at night. No really, that is why I started running. The thought of Disney at night just seemed so cool. I posted on Facebook that I wanted to sign up and asked if anyone wanted to do it with me. Most people dismissed it immediately because it wasn't cheap. (I now know that $99 for a 5k is absurd) One of my nurses at work said she'd run it with me and that's how it all began!

All my life I swore I hated running and was quick to tell everyone, "I don't run". I tried here and there. I was forced to do a bit of it in high school for basketball and PE class and I really did hate it. Running was not my thing. Everytime I'd try I'd find myself so tired and so out of breath and it just wasn't fun. I tried everything...in college I'd go to the track and try to run the straight-aways and walk the curves. I ran a whole mile once and that is only because my roommate at the time was talking to me about something and I didn't want our conversation to end. I thought I was going to die after that mile.

But someone told me about "Couch to 5k" and I found an app for my phone and decided to give it a try. I signed up for the race, joined a gym (with childcare), and purchased the app. I picked my 3 days a week and picked a time where I'd go to the gym. I was determined and focused and I just kept going. I quickly discovered that if I followed the app, it wasn't actually that bad. As my minutes of running increased and my minutes of walking decreased, I found myself so inspired and excited. I was achieving what I thought was impossible! I'll never forget the 1st time I ran for a whole 30 minutes on that treadmill...I felt invincible, like I could take on the world!

Our 1st race was awesome! I ran the whole 5k and LOVED getting to see behind the scenes of Disneyland! The race environment was SO fun and it was so easy to be excited when surrounded by so many other people. My 1st medal was super cheesy and our costumes were so simple but it was that first race, that feeling of accomplishment, that got me hooked!

After that race, I found another race, only this time a 10k instead of 5k. I found an upgrade to my app and started training but found that anything over 3 miles on the treadmill was pretty boring and unmotivating. I searched and searched and found a great deal on a BOB jogging stroller and so began our adventures of stroller running. My daughter was such a trooper and didn't ever complain about being stuck in the stroller. We used the time to listen to music and play Eye-Spy games. As I trained I hit a wall and had such a hard time completing the runs. I made up my own method, the landmark method. I'd pick a landmark ahead of me and set my focus on running to that landmark. Once I made it, I'd allow myself to walk to a chosen landmark. It seemed to work so that became my new method. Out with the app!

Our 10k proved to be long and hard but again, that feeling of accomplishment when crossing the finish line and the fun bling around my neck made it all worth it! Since I did the 10k I figured maybe I could do a 1/2. I was blessed with a new friend who became my running buddy and she'd drag me out there several days a week. She'd tell me our distance for the day and we'd set our run/walk timers and take off. I don't think I could have ever completed that 1/2 had I not had someone to run with and encourage me. She'd meet me early on the weekends to get in long runs and we'd stroller run during the week, stopping 1/2 way to let our kids play at the park.  God knew exactly what I needed.

In my 1st year of running I think I ran something close to 10 or 15 races. It was so much fun! Between that 1st year and now there have only been a few races and I haven't been anywhere close to the shape I was in back then...but I am making a come-back! In the past week something has finally clicked and I am actually looking forward to my runs and find myself focused and determined once out there, feet hitting the pavement.

Running has become quality time with my husband that past 6 months. With all of the craziness and uncertainty of life, it is a way to get outside and burn off some of the frustration and anxiety. It's one of the few times of quiet in our day. My amazing hubby has been so gracious and has let me take the lead as far as when to run/walk and I am so thankful for his company. (Plus, I enjoy the view since he's faster than I am!) I am so thankful for that race 3 years ago, for that night that was filled with adventure and determination!

Can't wait to see what races and adventures lie ahead!!!

Five Minute Friday: Share

With little ones at home, sharing is something we are constantly working on. Little brother wants whatever big sister has and if he doesn't get it, look out! But sometimes it's the other way around... there are times where big sister wants what brother has, be it snuggles with Mom, to be the one in the stroller, a snack, a hug, a toy, etc. Sharing is hard.

Sharing as adults can be hard too. Sharing feelings, sharing dreams, sharing money . . . it's hard stuff. Sometimes it is so much easier to keep things to yourself, to hide our dreams & feelings for fear of getting hurt. I am not good at sharing. I would rather keep to myself, build up a tall wall around my heart and avoid being vulnerable. But if I don't let others in, if I don't share a bit of who I am and what I am about, I miss out on being part of something greater than myself.

What is it God calling me to share? Maybe that lately I've felt so anxious about our future, my job, our finances (or lack there-of). Or maybe it's that I've been feeling pretty lonely and have been missing my friends who live far away. Why don't I share these things? I don't share these things because doing so may open the floodgates, doing so may leave me vulnerable, doing so makes me feel so weak and helpless. So often I stuff it all inside and then life, emotions, uncertainty...they all reach the point where they overwhelm me and leave me empty and paralyzed with fear. If instead, I would choose to SHARE with someone I love and trust, they could share the burden and whisper words of love, life, and encouragement where I need them most.

We were not created to do life alone. We were meant to share life...to share love, to share the ups and downs, the good and bad, the happy times and the sad. The Bible tells us that 2 is better than 1 or that a strand of 3 cords can not be easily broken. Nowhere does it say to be the lone ranger, to be strong on your own. It doesn't tell us that 1 is the best number.

Be brave today. Find someone to share life with. Find someone to share your heart with. Find someone who you can be real and honest with and then be open to their embrace and their words of wisdom and encouragement.

My Hubby Is A Trooper...Literally!

For Father's Day last year I signed the hubby and I up for the inagural Star Wars 10k race at Disneyland. My hubby loves all things Star Wars and Storm Troopers so I figured it would be fun and fitting for him to participate in it all! We had originally talked about going as Boba Fett & Han Solo but one of the great girls at Sparkle Athletic told us that if my hubby would wear his full Storm Trooper armor for the race, she'd pay for his bib. Hubby accepted the challenge and was excited and determined to do it. I love coming up with costumes for our races. I had to think of something that not everyone would be...I figured most girls would be Leia, R2 or an Ewok and I didn't want to look the same as everyone else. Not sure why, but I decided to be Luke Skywalker as an X-Wing Pilot. I dreamed it up and made it come alive and it was so fun! Here's some pics of our race:

My version of Luke Skywalker's X-Wing Pilot Costume

The finished product. This is my "flat runner", ready for the race!

In our corrals and ready to run. Started in the dark since the race started at 5:30am.

Entering into Disneyland.

Heading down Main Street.

Couldn't pass up a picture in front of Star Tours!

The lines for pictures with characters were SOOO long. We ad-libbed and did our own...from afar!

Running through CA Adventure.

He made all sorts of friends along the course...these Lego Troopers were pretty funny!

At the finish line.

The medals were AMAZING! I think it may be my  new favorite!

So proud of my hubby!!!

After our race came the Kids Races. This was little brother's 1st race!

He was so cute holding onto Daddy's hand while we waited.

There was no running involved for this little guy...just some very slow walking.

He loved his medal.

Had to stop by the Sparkle Athletic booth to say "thank you" in costume! They put a skirt on him and had him pose for pics!

I absolutely LOVE this picture!!! One of my favorites of the day!

Still Waiting

It's been 9 months now. 9 months of waiting and wondering what God has in store. 9 months of thinking "what if". 9 months of uncertainty. 9 months of having no clue what the future holds and what the future might look like. 9 months. It's a long time to feel like you are in limbo.

And yet I have been constantly reminded this week that someone WAY bigger than me has this all figured out already. HE already has a plan. HE already knows what comes next. HE already knows the answers to my "what if" questions. Isaiah 55 says "My ways are not your ways, my thoughts are not your thoughts... For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." This was one of those "duh" moments for me as I read these words this morning. 

My husband and I had just been talking less than 30 minutes before this about jobs and babysitters and what came next. Neither of us had answers and I left the conversation wondering an pondering what in the world life held for us and what things would look like a month from now. As I read those verses I felt a little stupid that I had lost sight of the fact that HE already knows. I can spend all day planning and dreaming and configuring my future, but it's pointless. HE already knows where and my hubby will get to work again or even IF my hubby will work in an office again. HE knows what position I will hold at work. HE knows what is best for our family. HE KNOWS. 

Sometimes we need a good kick in the butt. Someone to put us in our place and tell us to just RELAX and TRUST HIM. Consider my butt kicked. I choose today to trust HIS plan, HIS ways, HIS thoughts for me and for my family.

Five Minute Friday: Send

When I was 16 I went on my first short-term mission trip. I spent 2 weeks in Guatemala and fell head-over-heels in love with the people, the culture, the language, the everything! It was while I was on that trip that I felt the hand of God upon my life like no other time. It's like I felt him whisper to my inner-most being, "this is what I created you for". I left those 2 weeks knowing that I'd be back.

In Isaiah there's a verse that says, "Here am I. Lord SEND me." That verse has been my prayer before that trip and every since. Send me, Lord. Send me into this world you have created and use me to show your love to others. I use to think that in order for God to send me, it had to be overseas. While I would still love to end up overseas someday, God has had places to send me here, in the US.

Over the years, He has sent me a lot of different places. He has sent me to teach Sunday School, to snuggle sweet babies while their Mamas encountered Jesus, and to teach little ones that there is a God who loves them so very much. He has sent me to whisper words of hope and love to teenage girls who have no family and no home of their own. He has sent me to what seems like the ends of the earth: to Calcutta to sing over dying women, to Cambodia to play with orphans, to Kenya to build a building, and back to Guatemala time and time again to help others to see how God is at work around the globe.

Most recently, He has sent me to a children's hospital to work in the ED and provide support and distraction for families in crisis. He has sent me to that specific unit, during those specific hours, in that specific city . . . and so often I forget. I get caught up in the day-to-day, I get worn out and burnt out and I forget that it was HE who sent me there to be begin with. He has me right where He wants me and there is no better place to be. Now if I only I could remember that on a daily basis . . .

Five Minute Friday: Welcome

To truly feel WELCOME is to feel wanted, expected, anticipated even! The places where I feel most welcome are those places where I can just be me. No facades, no pretending, no having to present myself a certain way. Some of the most welcoming places I've been are those homes that are lived in and messy but always have a spot on the couch where I can sit, relax, and enjoy a cup of coffee. But it isn't always places that welcome us. Sometimes its people.

I'm not big on "vibes" but you can definitely tell when you walk into a new setting or new place whether or not you are welcome there. Have you ever met someone and immediately knew that they would be someone whom you would gladly welcome into your life and and they'd do the same for you? Those people who you feel that safety, that peace, that welcome...those are rare treasures that are few and far between.

The best place to be is in a welcoming setting with a friend who welcomes you to be you. One who welcomes you to share your heart, to explore your feelings, to cry, to laugh, to hope, to dream, to just let it all out. My heart longs for these places & people of welcome, the places & people that bring wholeness and healing and life. It is in these times of welcome that we are able to regroup, renew and refresh and in a sense, fill our buckets so we can then do the same and welcome others.

Thankful

As I was reflecting yesterday (Thanksgiving) about all I have to be thankful for, the one thing I found myself most thankful for is probably the thing that people would expect me to be least thankful for. In fact, if you were to ask my better half (hubby) about this, he would probably highly disagree with my thankfulness for this one thing. But still . . . it is what I am SOOOOO thankful for.

Seven months ago, my incredibly talented and gifted husband was unexpectedly layed off from his job. He LOVED his job . . . the work, the team, the clients, everything! He was blessed to be working with other people who shared his beliefs, morals and values and he was doing work that mattered. He had a job that he loved going to and where he left at the end of the day feeling satisfied and content. His being let go came as a complete surprise.

What we thought would be a brief season of unemployment has stretched into a long one. Like I said previously, I don’t think he would necessarily agree with my thankfulness of this season in his life. It is not what either of us had planned and it has made life quite interesting . . . but I’ve loved it! Sure, it’s taken a lot of adjusting and flexibility figuring out to do life together daily and how to come up with a routine/rhythm that doesn’t make the other person crazy, but I think we’ve done okay.

I am thankful for day after day of waking up next to my husband. I am thankful that I get to come home to him still awake! (Prior to this season, he’d be asleep when I got home and gone before I’d wake up.) I am SO thankful that he was with us for my daughter’s first day of Kindergarten, for her harvest carnival, for her parent/teacher conference, and that he’s been able to volunteer in her classroom. I am SO thankful for how he engages our kid’s imaginations in fun adventures and playtimes where the ordinary becomes extraordinary! I am beyond thankful for the bond that both of my kids have with their Daddy that wouldn’t have been so strong had he been at work every day instead of with them.

I know the past 7 months have been hard and frustrating for him, but he has taken each day in stride. He has been fully present and engaged with each of us and has loved us and served us with his whole heart. I’m guessing most days he’d probably be at work rather than changing diapers or watching Frozen for the zillionth time . . . but he doesn’t complain. He embraces the craziness that comes with each day and makes the most of each moment.

This year, I am so thankful for the blessings that God has poured out on us through my amazing husband and the quality time we have gotten to spend with him. I know this season won’t last forever and I know we will never get these moments back, so today I am thankful. I am thankful for 7 months of extra time with Daddy, for 7 months of getting to talk face-to-face with my better-half, for 7 months filled with fun memories and time spent together.

Thank you Lord for provisions and for blessing our family with an incredible Man of God! Thank you for his servant’s heart, his character and integrity, his hard-work ethic and his deep deep love for each of us! Thank you for this blessing that wasn’t anything we would every ask for or want, but yet You have made it SO sweet and SO good! You truly are good, ALL THE TIME!