Proud to be an American

This evening I had the incredible opportunity to support my little (well, he's not really very "little" any more, he's 18) brother as he performed with New America Singers at Camp Pendleton Marine Base...

We arrived about an hour early as we had to follow the team on base in order to get on post. As we sat out by the car waiting, several platoons of men marched past in formation. The platoons marched by, chanting their steps and responding to their Drill Instructor. I couldn't help but be in awe as I watched them march, thinking of the commitment they had made to serve their country in this way. Hope was enthralled with the "toy soldiers" marching by and even once we went inside the chapel to wait, she kept watching out the window for them.

When it was time, the men marched in and took their seats. (Nothing like a room filled with 150 sweaty men in uniform) As the performance began, the men were welcomed and made aware that this was to be a Christian performance. They were given the option to wait in another room if they did not want to be there and I don't think a single one of them left. I really wasn't sure what to expect from either group, the singers or the recruits.

Aaron's team sang a variety of songs and various team members participated in puppetry and dramatic readings. At one point, as Aaron's group sang "I'm proud to be an American", the men stood one by one, side by side, shoulder to shoulder, truly representing what that song is all about. As I looked out over the sea of desert camouflage, it hit me that it is these men who will go to war to fight for our freedom and to keep our country free. It is these young men who have committed to spend 90 days in boot-camp and maybe even their lives, leaving their families and all that is comfortable and safe in order to begin their careers in the United States Marine Corps.

At one point Aaron's group (Aaron is my brother) presented the gospel. The team shared the message of salvation boldly and simply and I was a bit curious as to how these recruits would perceive them and receive their message. When the time came to give these men an opportunity to receive Christ, at least half of the room raised a hand. WOW. Here are these young men, stripped of all that they have for 90 days, hungry for the One who knows them as individuals, as a beautiful creation, a masterpiece. Hungry for this God who will guide them through whatever endeavor or danger they may face, a God who promises never to leave them or forsake them.

The chaplain told us about 70 men raised their hands and had accepted Christ. The chaplain announced to the men that there would be a baptism @ 6:30am tomorrow and any who received Christ were invited to come and profess with their mouths that Jesus is Lord. There was a bit of extra time at the end where Aaron's leader asked the men if any of them had prayer requests that they'd like prayer for. One after the other they stood and asked prayer for their baby who had born since they'd been at bootcamp, for their Grandma who was ill, for family who had lost a loved one, for a Dad who had been diagnosed with cancer since the recruit had been at boot camp, for their platoons to make it to graduation day in June, etc. Here was a room full of recruits, training for the fight of their lives...while the world continued on around them outside of that base.

For maybe the 1st time tonight, I truly felt proud to be an American. Not that I am not thankful or grateful to live where I live, but I'm not sure I've ever felt pride in my country like that. It's really hard to put into words the overwhelming sense of pride and gratitude I felt towards these men tonight and towards the many men who have given their lives to serve our country and fight for our freedom. As the men asked and sang "Proud to Be An American" for a second time, I couldn't help but look around the room and feel truly proud to live where I live, in the country I am in.

Thank you to the men and women, sons and daughters, fathers and mothers, who have chosen to serve in the Armed Forces and to fight for our freedom. Thank you to those who have chosen to hold them loosely and have let them go, many times for months and years at a time, in order to pursue their calling to serve. Thank you to those who have lost their lives in many battles, near and far, in order to protect those who cannot protect themselves.

To the recruits we shared the chapel with tonight, I commit to praying for you and for your platoons and the families you represent as you continue on this journey of service and dedication to our country. I commit to raising my daughter to honor this country and deeply respect each of the men and women who have chosen the Armed Forces and to teach her the value of her freedom.

"Mother's" day!

So, tomorrow is Mother's Day... a day we celebrate our Moms and all that they are to us. I had the opportunity this past week to listen to a great talk about mothering...looking at "mother" as a verb or an action, rather than just a single person. We all gather things and learn from our own Moms, whether it be positive or negative, and we then carry that on to our own children. It's caused me to think this week about not only my own Mom, but also those who have "mothered" me over the years.

My own Mom worked hard to help provide for our family, she always dressed me well and assured that I was matching and looked cute. My Mom cared for our home and kept it clean and was always quick to welcome others inside. My Mom is the queen of inviting people over for coffee and hosting late night conversations that often last into the morning. My Mom is a night-owl and has kept me company on many a drive home from work over the years. My Mom is a bit of a perfectionist and if she asked to do something or create something, there is no doubt that she will do it well and will stay up until all hours assuring that it is just right.

It seems I am quite the opposite of my Mom in many ways and yet I am so thankful for the lessons she taught me and the example she led for me. I am grateful for how she loved me no matter what and put up with me all these years! I love that not only is she my Mom now, but she is also my friend. I love watching her with Hope now and seeing another side of her now that she is in the role of "Grandma" to my sweet girl!

I have been blessed with a few other women who have "mothered" me as I have grown and I am so grateful for these women as well...Some walked with me for many years, while others walked with me for a season. Either way, I am grateful for these Godly women who helped shape me.

When we moved back to California when I was in 4th grade, I somehow became quite taken by my music teacher. I don't know what it was about Cheryl, but I just thought the world of her. Over the years, she was my teacher in various subjects and took the time to teach me well. Thanks to Cheryl I have always LOVED English and writing. I think part of the reason I ended up at APU, was thanks to Cheryl and a trip we took in 7th grade to visit the campus. In high school I got to be a babysitter to Cheryl's girls and even got to help her teach summer school...Cheryl continually made time for me and invited me to share life with her and her family over the years. It is hard to believe that her "little girls" are now not so little at all.

The summer after 6th grade I met Julie at Jr. High camp. Julie was on staff at camp and somehow, I was drawn to her. Sweet Julie put up with numerous letters being sent and was so kind in responding to my many letters over the years. Although I mostly "knew" Julie through letters, I was privilege to witness her incredible faith as her husband was diagnosed with cancer. Still to this day, I am reminded of her unswerving faith and trust in God to heal Greg. Julie taught me what it meant to trust in the Lord with all my heart.

My freshman year of college I got the opportunity to go to Guatemala (again) with a new group...a group of police officers. Not sure how I got to be a part of that group, but I am thankful for the trip and the meeting of Tami. Tami walked with me over the next year, offering advice and guidance and helped me seek out God's will in various instances and situations. She heard me out, listened, and helped me to seek truth.

A few years out of college God led me to work at a church...the last place I ever thought I'd work. He allowed me to connect with Debbie early on in my time there and I am so thankful. Debbie met with me weekly for several years and I really feel as though I learned a TON from our time together. Debbie helped me walk through some pretty tough stuff and helped me learn to deal with my past in order to move forward. She asked me the hard questions and really challenged me grow in my relationship with Christ, my friendships with others, and even in my role @ the church. Each time we met, I knew she was going to ask me what I was learning and reading. Because of her unconditional love and acceptance, I was able to confess where I'd fallen short and rather than chastise me or make me feel bad, she'd encourage me to choose differently and do it different next time. There was awhile when I desperately needed those times together. I am grateful that now I can call her "friend".

I am so thankful for my Mom and these other amazing women who God placed in my life to "mother" me over the years. Happy Mother's Day Mom, Cheryl, Julie, Tami, and Debbie! I am so grateful for each of you and the way that God has used you to shape me and mold me into the woman/mom I am today.

Happy Easter

Easter this year was so much fun! Hope was all about the CHOCOLATE (yes, she's a choc-a-holic) and couldn't wait to eat as much as possible! She ran from egg to egg in the front yard and would get so excited when she found each one! When we were opening them all she'd take the chocolate (2 pieces in an egg) and give 1 piece to Grandma to hold and then she'd quickly unwrap the other one and stuff it in her mouth! Too funny! Both sides of the family came over and Hope was in heaven having everyone in the same spot!! It was a great day!

Here are a few pictures of Hope and her sweet friend Violet...Hope was still mad at Jaye for taking away her smoothie that she flung all over so not the best smile, but oh well! These girls are too cute and make a great team...Violet likes Skittles and other sweets where Hope just prefers chocolate!

Hope's dress was a gift from her 1st birthday from a dear friend at work. It looked adorable and I was so happy to not have to buy a dress this year! I think she looked pretty darn cute!!

Sea World

Yesterday we spend the day with one of my favorite friends, Hope's "Auntie Karyn". Karyn and I met at a preview weekend before college and then ended up as roommates on our trip to Calcutta. God knew what He was doing when He put us together in India as that trip was the start of a forever friendship. It's not every day you meet someone who shares your passions, hopes, dreams, etc. We don't get to see each other as often as we would like anymore, but when we do get together, we just pick up wherever we left off. Karyn was on spring break so we had a girl's day and headed down to Sea World to play together! Enjoy some pics!

Hope is definitely Jaye's daughter as they both LOVE popcorn! She was so happy to munch on popcorn while waiting for the Shamu show!She thought her Shamu cookie was pretty funny...

Auntie Karyn is so much fun!

Church Egg Hunt

On Saturday our church held their annual Easter Egg hunt and pancake breakfast. Hope loved every minute of hunting for eggs and playing with her friends, Violet and Kayla. After breakfast, all the kids go into one of the rooms at church and they read the Legend of the Easter Egg while the parents are out hiding eggs. Hope, Kayla, and Violet sat up front and had more fun swapping baskets through the story! So as always, the pictures are in backwards order, but I'm over it! Enjoy pics of our sweet girls and their fun egg hunt!

Beach Day!

On Friday we celebrated my dear friend's birthday at the beach. It was a gorgeous day and the weather was perfect! Hope LOVED the sand and kept asking for "more sandbox". I wish we lived closer so we could do that more often. Enjoy some pictures of our day!

Life is Precious

I was reminded yet again last night of the gift that life truly is.

Each day, on my drive to work I pass a beautiful cemetery. Each day I can't help but notice the easy-ups set up, either waiting for a grave-side service to begin or waiting to be taken down as the service is over. Each day there is at least one set up, some days two or three or four. On the days when services are being held as I drive by, I can't help but notice each of the cars and each of the people standing or sitting there, remembering the one they loved.

Scattered throughout the cemetery are various floral arrangements, balloons, holiday decor, etc. You can always tell when a special day is coming as balloons are a plenty, flowers are overflowing, and often people are gathered. Many days there are family picnics happening or quiet conversations being had at grave-sites. Seeing these families gathered or a single soul sitting quietly, reminds me of how precious life is and how quickly it can change.

Again last night I helped a family say "goodbye" to their child. I met with siblings and told them of their brother's impending death. I had to explain to them that the machines were going to be disconnected and that it was very likely that their sibling's body would no longer be able to work by itself. I encouraged them to give him kisses, hold his hand, and tell him how much they loved him as it may be their last chance.

These 5 siblings weren't strangers to me. Over 2 years ago I met with these same 5 siblings to tell them of their brother's diagnosis/disease. After teaching them of this new disease I brought them back to visit brother and spend some time with them. I hadn't seen them since that day 2 years ago and I found myself wondering what life had been like for them over the years and how they had certainly changed and grown-up as a result of this stress their family had endured. Yesterday, when the time was right, I walked them back to their brother's room and quietly watched from outside as their tears spilled over and their poor hearts broke.

It is something else, watching a parent, a sibling, a family say their last "goodbye". It is heart-wrenching and so sad and yet you have to stay objective and remove yourself from the experience and emotion in order to do your job and help the family. It is almost like an out-of-body experience...watching from a distance, being a silent observer to a family's most intimate moments. And yet, this is their reality. This is a very real, very poignant moment that will haunt them for the rest of their lives.

I am reminded of my favorite set of verses, the verses that God has placed on my life as a calling...

Isaiah 61

The Year of the LORD’s Favor

¹ The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,^[a]
2 to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
³ and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor.

Sometimes all I can do is pray. Pray that the sovereign Lord will replace their mourning with joy at some point down the road. I pray that God would comfort them beyond our abilities and comprehension...that He would whisper quietly of His love and His goodness in the middle of their pain. Rather than get caught up wondering how these last moments will change their lives and wondering who these kids will become after this day, I instead need to busy myself with praying over their moments and their days and praying that they find this God who I love and this God who has again and again proven Himself faithful even in the midst of loss and grief.

So as hard as it may be to walk with these families or as sad as it may be to drive by the cemetery each day, I again need to place my hope in the Lord who has created each of these lives, who has knit each of these families together as only He can do. He has plans for each of them, plans for good and plans for prosperity. He will carry them and He will provide for them. I am grateful He chooses to use me and teach me as He does!